Next steps for getting healthy

Last time I wrote about this, I was feeling really frustrated and had some setbacks. I haven't exactly made any progress.. yet. I've been thinking about some solutions and found some things I'm going to try.

I found this slideshow on WebMD that has exercises that help strengthen the abs and lower back.
lower back pain WebMD slideshow-exercises I was suprised and dismayed to realize how many exercises I'd been doing that were actually irritating my back pain. I've started to incorporate these into my workouts. Speaking of workouts, I plan on doing more of them, but not as intense. I tend to overdo it when I exercise, then the next day my back and muscles are screaming in pain. Sometimes even the day after that. The next time I'm supposed to exercise, I don't want to. After skipping one, it's easier for me to skip the next and the next thing I know I'm not working out at all.

So I'm going to do a little every day, then a little more, until I'm actually less of a lazy blob oozing reluctantly out of my recliner and more of an energetic athlete with energy and strength. I used to run track and cross country so I know I've got it in me, damn it!

I've also read that if your heart rate goes to high for to long it can actually cause lactic acid to build up in your muscles, making you sore later. So I downloaded an app to monitor my heart rate so I can make sure it's high enough to be worth it but not so high that I regret it afterwards. This is going to be an adjustment, but if it works then it'll be worth it.

Also I ordered four It Works body wraps today. I guess they also come with defining cream. I'm going to try them on my stretched out jiggly stomach, and hope for the best. They are expensive, but if they help at all then it'll be worth the price. Once I get them I plan on telling you how they work. If I have the guts I might even do before and after pics of my tummy.

Judging People's Parenting Skills

As a long time fan of Alphamom's advice column I read it all the time. This one is especially great. If you haven't had a chance to read it yet, here's a link alphamom-on other peoples parenting.
The lady writing in for advice doesn't actually have any kids yet, but as someone that's read about it, she has some definite opinions about how her partner's niece should be disciplined. I've got to pause for a moment of nostalgia for that feeling of certainty on the rules of parenting that I once had before I'd actually had any kids. I saw your kid misbehaving? Well not only did I know how you should fix them, I also was certain that whatever you did was wrong. What a self righteous jerk I was! Call it irony or call it karma, but I constantly run into people that have this same judgey attitude. Some of them are family, some fellow parents, some are total strangers giving us the stink eye as we shop at the grocery store. I'm not saying that I'm a perfect parent, in fact I've made more mistakes than I can count, but the important thing is that I've learned from them. As a parent, I've felt more judged by others than at any other time in my life.

Everyone has their own parenting style and it's very easy to stand on the outside looking in and say that they're doing it wrong. In Alphamom's column, it sounds to me like the 4 year old's parents need to teach her some limits, but who knows? Maybe they think that she's only doing it for attention and that ignoring it will make her stop. Maybe the only time she acts like that is during these family gatherings and they're even more frustrated about it than the letter writer. Is that what I would do if it was my kid? No way. I can also understand why she's concerned that they opt to feed her sweets instead of dinner, but if the parents aren't actually mistreating their child, then keep the judgement to yourself. If they ask your opinion, feel free to share it with them. I love love love Alphamom's suggestion that they offer to babysit for a few hours, because it might help them to open up a dialogue with the parents about her misbehavior, and also "You’ll also get to see firsthand that the road to parenting hell is paid with know-it-all-y good intentions, yes. Three hours alone with this child could completely shatter every illusion you had about knowing anything about child-raising, sure." Her advice to praise the little girl when she's doing something right is also great. I suspect I like it so much because that's what works for me.

I think parenting is such an emotional topic that criticizing someone's parenting style is probably a terrible idea. Unless you want them to really dislike you, then tread very lightly when you're talking about it, or just keep your opinions to yourself. 

Weight Loss Woes

Whether in a picture or on person, anyone that looks at me can see that I'm overweight. What isn't visibly obvious is that I have problems with my back. While not directly related, I haven't been able to find an exercise plan that doesn't cause a ton of pain, which is definitely a problem. I've asked numerous doctors- my general practitioner sent me to see a specialist, the specialist said that I needed to talk to a physical therapist. I can't go see a physical therapist until I start getting spinal injections, which I'm waiting to have approved by my insurance company. This can take up to two weeks, and I have a lot of mixed feelings because I don't want to be in pain all the time, but spinal injections!? Those two words don't belong together, and I'm worried they'll really hurt. Actually I'm certain they'll really hurt.

Currently my exercise options are so limited that I mainly have to concentrate on dieting, which isn't something that I find easy. My doctor recommended some prescription diet pills, which helped but the side effects became ridiculous! Despite the fact that I took them in the morning I would lay awake until 5:00 or 6:00 am. After a night when I literally didn't sleep a wink I talked to my doctor, who said I didn't need sleeping pills and prescribed something new. This new prescription had two different meds, one was the same thing as what I was taking before, plus another to make it last longer. The insurance company said it would cost over a hundred dollars a month! I can't afford that, and the last thing I need is something that is even stronger and longer lasting. I've decided that I'm done with diet pills, at least for now.

I've lost 14 pounds over the last few months, going from 231 to 217. I've got a long way to go, and I'm currently sooo incredibly frustrated! Just when I make it down to 215, I bounce back to 217. I don't know if I can make any meaningful progress without adding exercise. I hope these spinal injections are approved and really help me. Also I'm glad it's getting warmer, so I can load the girls up in the stroller and go for more walks. I've been thinking about joining the YMCA, and maybe it's time to do that as well. I'm really tempted to give up, but screw that! I can do this, even if I'm miserable about it right now. Who needs pills anyway?

Do it Yourself Play Dough

Today we got out the play dough and some plastic cookie cutters and had a ton of fun. It kept both girls busy for over an hour! To keep the mess to a minimum I put an old shower curtain on the coffee table. The dough we used was over a month old and was still soft and pliable when I pulled it out of the fridge. The recipe I used is:
No Cook Play Dough
1/2 cup salt
2 cups flour
2 tbsp oil
2 tbsp cream of tartar
1 1/2 to 2 cups boiling water
Food coloring
All you have to do is mix everything but the food coloring together, then knead until smooth. Add food coloring and knead until thoroughly mixed in.
If you're making more than one color, try to make sure the colors will mix well, or you might wind up with a shade like what you see in the picture. This was originally neon pink, neon green and blue when I first made it.

Honesty is the Best Policy

After getting in trouble and getting a time out, we asked Jaydra if she was ready to be good and follow the rules. Her answer was a resounding no! After a little while, we asked her the same question, and she said, "No, not yet." She might not be perfect, but at least she's honest. 

The Parent Rap

Abortions and Surrogate Pregnancy

Surrogate offered 10,000 to abort pregnancy- CNN
Crystal Kelley was hired to be a surrogate by a friendly couple who were friendly and kind to her, until an ultrasound revealed that the baby had multiple serious health problems. That's when the train ran off the tracks. The couple wanted her to have an abortion and even went so far as to try to call the hospital to schedule one for her. Crystal said she was tempted when she was offered $10,000 to have an abortion and even asked for $15,000. She'd decided to be a surrogate because she needed the money, but ultimatly decided that she didn't want an abortion. After the parents told her their intention was to turn the baby over to the state after they were born, she fled the state to Michigan. In Michigan, the baby is considered to legally belong to the surrogate mother, so she could decide who would be the best people to adopt the baby.

Personally I think abortion should be legal, but ethically it's wrong to get one except in cases of rape or when it's medically necessary. I'm well aware that not everyone feels that way. In the case of surrogacy, I think that it should still be up to the surrogate mother. No one should be able to legally force someone to get an abortion if they don't want one. When I was pregnant, my husband and I were on the same page- we were going to have the baby, come what may. I think that this is something that should be discussed by the parents and the surrogate before the pregnancy, with the specific plan they agreed on laid out in their contract. In Crystal Kelley's case, their agreement was open to interpretation, which is a big reason why this became a problem.

Dry Erase Crayons

The other day I found a couple of really cool Leapfrog learning games in the dollar bin at Target. I got one for ABC's and one for colors and shapes. They have a spinner on the front, with a worksheet on the back, and since they're laminated they can be used over and over. We already had some washable dry erase markers, but that means that Alicia (1) couldn't use them because she's still in that stage where everything ends up in her mouth, not to mention all over her and everything around her. Jaydra (2) loves markers, just not the part about keeping track of the lids and putting them back on when she's done. Actually she likes to stick the lids on her fingers and pretend she has rainbow nails. Needless to say, markers dry up fast in our house.I saw an ad for these dry erase crayons and thought that there was no way they could wipe off as easily as the markers, but decided to try them anyway. Nothing ventured nothing gained, right?

I bought them for about $3.50 and we tried them out. They actually work pretty well! *As a side note, crayola is not sponsoring this although if they wanted to send me any samples I'd love to try them out.* They come with 8 crayons and a cleaning cloth, which works slightly better than my dry eraser. They also have a sharpener built into the box, which confused Jaydra. She couldn't understand why mommy wanted to make her crayons sharp. To wipe them off, I had to press down a little and they were slightly harder to erase than markers. Dry erase crayons made cleaning up the inevitable collateral damage on the table much easier than it is with normal crayons. Jaydra did a sneak attack on the curtains, and they will definitely mark fabric, but the box says they're washable so I'm really hoping that's true. I'll update about that when the curtains are dry.

*Update* Curtains are as good as new. 

Hello!

My name is Jessie, and I'm a stay at home mother of two girls. They are one and two, with tons of energy, creativity, and stubbornness. We like to play games and do crafts as often as I have the wherewithal and energy to do them. Besides my girls, my current obsessions are knitting, planning out my garden for spring and losing weight.